Space in a relationship

 Importance of space in a relationship:

There is a saying that goes, "He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words". 

Do you agree with this, people?

In this post, I am going to focus on a very important aspect of any relationship, and that is space. Having personal space in a relationship is so important.

Just like everything else in life, relationships need a break too. I am not talking about anything negative here. For instance, we need to spend time with our respective friends as well. I am suggesting that we all need space in our relationships, of any kind. 

Let’s face it, no one likes a clingy and needy partner. We all need space, from our family, friends, partners, and co-workers. And it’s an essential ingredient for a healthy relationship.

How does a relationship without space look like:

1. Constant communication and contact: You do not need to call the other person all the time to know the whereabouts.

2. Lack of boundaries: You do not need to share each and every detail of your life. It’s okay to keep some things to yourself and for yourself. 

3. Jealousy and possessiveness: You should not be doubtful of the other person’s actions or words and get jealous for no reason at all. They are not your possession.

4. Lack of trust and respect.

5. Enmeshment: Two partners are so close that they lose their sense of individuality.

6. You tend to coddle the other, which does not allow one to grow and learn.

7. You try to always help the other, even without being asked to, to always please your partner.

8. You have the urge to keep talking always because silence makes you uncomfortable and insecure.

Is space good for relationships?

The answer is YES. Space is not only good, but also healthy. Let us find out how, from the below mentioned statements:

1. It gives space for individual growth. It allows partners to retain their individuality.

2. It inculcates a sense of independence.

3. It helps partners appreciate each other more and avoid taking each other for granted.

4. It prevents co-dependency.

5. It helps maintain excitement and mystery, keeping the spark alive.

6. It allows partners to gain fresh perspectives, which can help stave off boredom that can naturally set in over time.

7. It boosts communication. When the partners get back after a break, they are more likely to communicate with honesty and openness.

8. There is no scope for suffocation, and you are content with yourself. And, when you are happy, your happiness naturally radiates into your relationship.

9. When the relationship is largely healthy, you automatically stress less.

Sometimes a space can be beneficial during difficult times or even mend a broken relationship. A period of taking a break can give both the individuals the opportunity to cool off, reflect on the relationship, and make changes if necessary.

Giving space in a relationship also leads us to the concept of privacy. There are some things which are private, solely for oneself, not even for your significant other.

I know of many people who share their social media passwords with their partners. They give their partners access to their accounts and let them manage those. But I believe this is a mistake.

Passwords are called passwords for a reason. They are meant to protect our privacy.

While some people feel comfortable sharing their passwords with their partners, I believe it is important to consider the risks involved. It can actually damage the trust we have with our partners. 

It can also cause emotional distress. It is ridiculous, how it can lead to confusion and uncertainty about who you are actually talking to. The complications it creates are so numerous that they could easily warrant an entire article.

Why create unnecessary troubles and make our lives a mess? 

How much space is too much space in a relationship:

It is also important to keep in mind, giving each other space doesn’t mean that we have to completely cut off contact. Too much space can be detrimental too, there should be a balance.

There is no one-size-fits-all answer to the above question. The amount of space that is needed for a healthy relationship varies depending on the couple’s individual needs and preferences.

Sometimes space is required for pursuing one’s hobby, while at other times, it is required just for some “alone time” or “me time”.

Some signs you are giving yourselves too much space:

1. You rarely communicate with each other, even about important things.

2. You tend to lose interest in each other and largely feel disconnected. Both physically as well as emotionally.

3. You do not spend quality time together anymore.

4. You are not much aware of each other’s life events.

When you notice such signs, it’s time to reassess the relationship as to how to balance both, space and togetherness.

How to ask for space without hurting each other:

Sometimes, it becomes important to ask for space. It is necessary to have clear communication about what one needs in a relationship. One needs to be honest, without hurting each other.

One should also be sensible enough to understand others' needs and do the needful without getting worked up and insecure. 

Final thoughts:

Space in a relationship, whether you give or ask for it, only works when there is a foundation of trust, respect and love. 

We need to understand, space does not mean separation. It does not mean absence of love. 

Rather, it is a key component in a healthy relationship.

Happy Space- ship everyone.

                                                                                                                       Sucheta

Disclaimer: I am not an expert or a professional in the field of mental health. This writing is based solely on my experience and observation, and it is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice. If you need help with mental health issues, please contact a qualified professional.