Social Media

 (Un)Social Media

I have always steered clear of social media, until I started writing a blog, which needed a platform and I naturally veered towards LinkedIn. Well, that’s it. 

I know, one media is not enough for a blog to be viable, but I still do not have the capacity or the alacrity to do others. One medium, LinkedIn, is more than enough for me.

I remember, during my teenage years, there was Orkut. It was such a rage. All went excited and I was no different. I opened an account in Orkut. Not because of peer pressure, but more for keeping an eye on my crush (ha-ha, those were the days), who changed the school for plus two.

The very first desktop came into my house, when I was in high school, and it got easier for me to chat on Orkut. I was wide-eyed. Excited. 

Social media was completely new then and I was naive enough to just enjoy it and not feel any sort of pressure. 

I closed the account only when Orkut closed down.

Then came the avalanche of social media. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and whatnot. It hit us like a wave. While it connected the whole world, undoubtedly, it also added some sort of complexity and negativity in our lives.

Social media has really changed the world, right? Sometimes, when we think and look back, everything seems unimaginable. Such a thing was ever possible! 

It was started to create connections, world over. The first known online chat system was Talkomatic, back in 1973. In this ever-evolving world, social media has also evolved.

It is not merely a chatting platform anymore, It is much more than that. Almost anything and everything is possible online.

Wait! This is not something new you are reading. So, let us get to the point.

Social to (Un)social:

It is quite paradoxical in nature. It is meant to bring people together, however, on the contrary, it can also lead to feelings of loneliness and disconnection.

Whether social media is a boon or a bane, is a long-standing debate. Actually, it is both. As they say, “a coin has two sides”.

Social Media- A boon:

Needless to say, the advent of social media has changed our lives for the better. The world has become smaller, and we have connections world over, just with a click. 

Not only connecting with others, but also, there are so many instances, where these platforms have been lifesaving.

Few instances:

Emergency Communication and response:

1. Natural Disasters - During Hurricane Harvey, in 2017, there was a network of “digital lifeboats” created by social media users, to connect people in need, with rescue boats.

2. Missing persons.

3. Medical Emergencies - Looking for blood donors becomes easier. Searching for the required medical services etc.

Raising Awareness and Education:

1. Health Campaigns.

2. Fundraising platforms.

3. Community support, whether financial, emotional or practical.

Direct Interventions:

1. Suicide Prevention

2. Law Enforcement

The possibilities and the benefits are endless.

Social Media - A bane:

If we really think deeply, social media is also a very dark place. This is a place where what you see is not what you get.

It is strange that these platforms, which are designed to connect us, can actually be the cause of our mental distress.

Social Media and Mental Health:

In spite of all the advantages we have with social media (SM), we cannot deny its negative impact on our mental well-being. It will not be incorrect to say that SM is the breeding ground for all sorts of dark emotions, such as envy, jealousy, loneliness, depression, anxiety etc.

While we look forward to fostering meaningful connections online, we tend to end up feeling lonelier. In the real world, we talk, sitting face to face, or on the phone, which is instantaneous.

While in the virtual world, the person we intend to talk to might not be present online at that very moment, which makes us feel lonelier and ignored.

Negative aspects:

1. Feelings of insecurity and inadequacy - We look at all the beautiful images of people enjoying and merry making. We see people traveling to exotic locations, eating out at fancy restaurants and we think everyone is enjoying highs in their lives.

Though we know that lows are part of everyone’s life, yet we tend to forget that and feel insecure about ourselves. Then arises sadness and self-pity. We compare and start feeling inadequate and inferior.

2. Fear of missing out (FOMO) - We keep looking at the notifications, so as not to miss out on anything. We keep checking for updates and almost get compelled to respond right away.

3. Loneliness - It sounds strange, but it is true that the media, which is actually supposed to help us feel connected, make us feel lonelier. Research and statistics also support this.

4. Anxiety and depression - Nothing beats physical interactions. With the rise in the use of social media, these physical interactions are getting far and fewer between, which is naturally giving rise to mental health disorders like anxiety and depression.

5. Cyberbullying and Cyber Crime - People are using technology to bully people, in the form of hurtful comments, fake profiles and what not.

Teenagers are the worst affected from cyberbullying. 

Cybercrime has gone up immensely resulting in the rise of online frauds, identity theft, data breaches etc.

6. Self-centeredness - social media is practically all about selfies and self-promotion and mostly everything about self. This is leading to lack of real connections and lack of empathy.

Social Media and Me:

As I mentioned before, I never had any fascination for social media, ever, until I was on LinkedIn for my blog. 

Few months into it, I realized my apprehensions about it were right. It does affect me negatively. While it undoubtedly is helping me reach out and increase my reader base for my blog, the negative impact is undeniable as well.

Some personal experiences:

I connected with a psychologist on LinkedIn and started talking through DMs. We had a nice chat for a few days. She appreciated me, complimented me, saying, “You’re so sweet.” We exchanged numbers even. 

I wanted to talk to her, a form of counselling, where I was upfront about my inability to pay. She was kind enough to agree, at first. But, later on, she changed her mind and asked me to pay to be able to continue sessions.

I was disheartened but understood. I recognised it was her professional obligation. It is her job. I could not start any sessions; however, we maintained a friendly rapport. Had normal, casual chats, once in a while.

However, suddenly, I discovered, I have been blocked by her. 

I was disheartened. Once again. I could not understand what went wrong. Nothing untoward happened.

I tried calling her once, and quite naturally there was no response.

I was left confused and obviously hurt. My self-esteem was punctured.

Being quite a sensitive person, I kept thinking about it for some time. After a few days, I moved on. But the damage was done. 

You see, getting ghosted and blocked can impact your mental health negatively.

This is one such incident, I am sure most of us would relate with.

Wrapping Up:

In today’s hyper-connected world, social media has become an inescapable force. It is a necessity of our lives, both for professional as well as personal reasons.

However, just like any other science and technological inventions, this is a double-edged sword. The responsibility lies within us, as to how we use them to our advantage and protect ourselves from the cons.

Let’s steer clear from doom scrolling  and save our precious energies.

We need to be mindful while navigating through the world of social media and make sure to make our well-being our priority.

Take care everyone!

                                                                                                                                  Sucheta

Disclaimer: I am not an expert or a professional in the field of mental health. This writing is based solely on my experience and observation, and it is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice. If you need help with mental health issues, please contact a qualified professional.